Be listening to the Breakfast Show just after 7:00 am weekdays to ensure you get your daily dose and be first card out of the deck for the day.

Monday: My anatomy class had to assemble a human skeleton, and I hid one of the arm bones as a joke. No one found that humerus!

Elvis’s Bonus: Went to the doctor the other day, he said my prostate was good. I was deeply touched!

Bob’s Bonus: I was going to join the Monks, but I didn’t the chants!

Tuesday: Today on the street a man asked me for a dollar. I told him that I only carry big bills. He said give me one of those. So I gave him my electric bill!

Elvis’s Bonus: I tried to walk like an Egyptian, now I have to go to a Cairo practor!

Bob’s Bonus: I was going to go to a Paul Simon show, but I kept slip sliding away!

Wednesday: What do you call a zombie who writes music? A decomposer!

Bob’s Bonus: What do you call a group of baboons? A Congress!

Elvis’ Bonus: In Australia we call it an elevator, in Britain they call it a lift. I guess we were raised differently!

Thursday: Why was the duck arguing with the plastic surgeon? Because he wanted to have his bill reduced!

Bob’s Bonus: According to females, computers are male. Because when computers communicate, only they and experts can understand!

Elvis’ Bonus: I accidentally swallowed a heap of Scrabble pieces…my next trip to the toilet could spell trouble!

Friday: I made a statue of Dirty Harry in my pottery class. Then I said to my teacher: “Go ahead, bake my clay!”

Nikki’s Mumma joke: People who use selfie sticks really need to have a good look at themselves!

Nikki’s Bonus: What’s Ironman without his suit? Stark naked!