Be listening to the Breakfast Show just after 7:00 am weekdays to ensure you get your daily dose and be first card out of the deck for the day.

Monday: I sleep in a castle once every two weeks. It’s my fort night!

Gerhard’s Bonus: Pasteurised – just too far to see!

Elvis’ Bonus: What did the gladiator say when a lion ate his wife? Nothing – he was gladiator!

Bob’s Bonus: An officer pulled up a woman for speeding. She admitted to speeding so he asked her name. She said ‘Frida’. Officer asks for her surname. She said ‘Go”. So he said Frida Go? So she sped off!

Tuesday: What do you call the smartest mountain? Mount Cleverest!

Bob’s Bonus: I need professional help. I need a chef, a maid and a butler?

Wednesday: A friend of mine has a mobile phone shaped like an Italian dumpling. It’s a gnocchia!

Bob’s Bonus: Don’t believe everything you read on the doors of public toilets. Sharon isn’t up for a good time. That was an awkward phonecall!

Dave’s Bonus: What do the Irish use to clear their jungles? Tree fellas!

Elvis’ Bonus: I just bought myself a new blind fold. But I can’t see myself wearing it!

Thursday: Did you hear that Mickey and Goofy went to outer space. They were looking for Pluto!

Bonus: How did the other planets react when they found out the Sun was their leader? They started a revolution!

Bob’s Bonus: Why can’t leopards hide? Because they are always spotted!

Elvis’ Bonus: I lent my blind mate some money. He told me he’d pay me back next time he saw me!

Friday: After stealing all the punctuation marks off the judge’s keyboard… I’m expecting a long sentence!

Nikki’s Mumma joke: What’s the best gift to give someone? A broken drum – no one can beat it!